Things I wish I could tell my Pregnant Self

Being a first-time mom is kind of scary I would say because your expectations versus reality do not match in any way and you seem to be losing a battle against your baby.When you have your second child you know what to expect and take things more lightly. This post is not to scare some new moms out there but just a fun post for those expecting their first baby.

1 : Sleep as much as you can:

I know this can sound a bit cliched but it is true to a great extent. During pregnancy, you would feel so sleepy but due to so many reasons, you would not be able to sleep. Post pregnancy you hardly get any time to sleep with night feedings, diaper changes etc. In the daytime, you would have other work like taking a bath, eating and your other house chores while the baby is sleeping or you get to use your phone :)

2 : Breastfeeding is not easy:

Mothers have done this for ages, so this must be the most rewarding experience you can get - you might have heard people say this or read on social media where these models(I prefer calling them like that) are paid to post. The reality is a lot different and it might take months to establish a breastfeeding relationship. I am not kidding and it took me 3 months to get my baby properly latched with the help of a lactation consultant and my never ending perseverance. Of course, once you master it, it is the easiest way to feed your baby especially if you are traveling etc and you end up saving money on formula.

3 : Labour need not be like how you want it to be or think it is going to be:

Everyone around me said - "Oh my God, you are so active, you are going to have a breeze of a labour." Well everyone, thank you so much for giving me false hopes. I suffered a 17-hour labour and it was not easy to lie glued to the bed and being monitored continuously. So don't set any expectations and be prepared to go with the flow and listen to your doctor.

4 : Postpartum Anxiety/Depression/Baby Blues - These are real:

I agree that being a mom is a blessing but it does take a time to sink in that you are the primary caregiver for the new tiny human being. Being sleep deprived after what your body has gone through the 9 months does take a toll on your emotional state as well. I have cried so many times without any reason and have also undergone postpartum anxiety which is not new to any first-time mom.

5 : Bouning back to pre-pregnancy weight is not easy:

I agree that celebrities have the need and the time to get back in shape post pregnancy because of the body shaming that media does to them. However even we will be targeted by so many saying that we have gained weight and so on but to tell you honestly, in the free time that I get, the only thing that I wish to do is compensate for my lost sleep. Breastfeeding makes me a lot hungrier and I sometimes eat so much that I feel embarrassed to eat in restaurants. So don't set any goals or hopes to become fit as soon as you deliver. Quality time with your newborn is very essential.

6 : Prepare yourself to be shameless:

You are going to be inspected by many doctors and nurses while you deliver and also the lactation consultant following your delivery. 
Your baby is going to cry in public places and you will have to feed the baby immediately or run to the toilet (in India, sadly there are no nursing rooms) with a wailing baby to feed her. Society will definitely throw remarks at you but your child is utmost important to you at that juncture.

7 : Prepare to receive 'N' number of free advice:

There are some people who will give genuine advice and of course you will need it as a new mom.But there will also be unwanted advice that will make you more anxiety prone and doubt your ability as a mother but just chuck it and believe in yourself. You are the best mother for your baby.

8 : Falling in love with your baby happens over a period of time:

This is a very controversial topic and I am expressing only my view. My baby was taken to the NICU as soon as she was born due to some breathing difficulties and I had to be away from her for 6 days which was a very traumatizing experience for me. I did not get that initial bonding time with her which is very essential for any mother and baby to have a good breastfeeding relationship as well. I had to visit her only during visitation hours and could not even carry her for 2 days. Taking care of a newborn can be very overwhelming at times and you will feel tired too. So falling in love happens over a period of time when your baby starts responding to you more and more and give it some time. Take it easy and stay happy!!!

9 : Seek family support if you feel overwhelmed and do not be ashamed of it:

I was under the impression that I can take care of my baby and my housework all by myself until the reality struck me. I am too grateful for my mother who stood by me during the tough times and also my extended family. I really think a new mom needs her family's support in taking care of her baby so that she can recuperate well from the birth itself. I initially thought that I was a loser because I could not take care of my own baby but I later realized that self-care too was important and it is okay to seek help from family and friends.

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